Motherhood Isn’t Getting Any Easier… So I Decided to Get Stronger

Here’s the truth: society loves to sell us the idea that motherhood is supposed to be hard. Like, really hard. The overwhelmed, sleep-deprived, completely frazzled mom who needs wine every night and a girls’ night out every other weekend? That’s the picture we’ve been sold, right?

But let’s call it like it is. That doesn’t have to be the story we tell ourselves. Sure, motherhood is tough, but it doesn’t have to be a constant grind of exhaustion, sacrifice, and feeling like you’ve lost yourself. And honestly? I’m over that narrative.

I’ll be real with you—when I found out I was pregnant with baby number two, something clicked. I had two big realizations:

1. Motherhood wasn’t going to get any easier. In fact, the load I was carrying was about to get a whole lot heavier.
2. And that was okay. Actually, it was more than okay. It meant it was time for me to get stronger.

So here I am, deep in the thick of it, in the middle of this pregnancy, figuring out how I’m going to show up as a better version of myself. I’m not here to tell you I’ve got it all figured out—I’m right in the trenches with you. But as I work through this journey of reinvention, I’m sharing what’s been helping me, hoping it might help you too.

We’ve All Been Sold a Lie: Motherhood Doesn’t Have to Be “Hard”

Look, I’m not saying motherhood is all sunshine and rainbows. But I’ve had enough of this “it’s supposed to be hard” narrative. We’ve been conditioned to believe that motherhood is all about struggle, burnout, and endless sacrifice. That the only way to “earn” being a good mom is to be completely depleted. But that’s bullshit.

Yes, motherhood is challenging. Yes, it’ll confront you with things you never thought you could handle. But does it have to be hard all the time? No.

Motherhood isn’t meant to be this relentless cycle of exhaustion. It’s supposed to be a transformative experience—a chance to become the best version of yourself. Not a struggle you’re just supposed to power through.

I used to believe that “hard” was just the way it was. Now, I’m realizing that the hard stuff doesn’t have to define me. It’s about seeing motherhood as the opportunity for growth that it truly is. When I shifted my perspective, I stopped letting the struggle consume me, and I started embracing the process of becoming a stronger, better version of me.

Motherhood as a Catalyst for Growth: Reinventing Yourself in the Process

Here’s something I’ve learned the hard way: motherhood isn’t just about raising kids. It’s about raising yourself too. And I’m not talking about trying to “bounce back” to who you were pre-kids. Nope, that person doesn’t exist anymore. Motherhood is a transformation—one that shapes you into a new version of yourself, and frankly, that’s the point.

Think about it—what’s more motivating than setting an example for your kids? What’s more powerful than being the kind of woman who shows up for herself and her family, who is stronger because of all the hard stuff? I’m telling you, motherhood is the perfect pressure cooker for growth. Just like how we procrastinate on big projects until the last minute (you know you’ve done it), motherhood forces you to step up in ways you didn’t expect. And while the pressure might feel intense, it also fuels you in ways nothing else can.

This is where the magic happens: when you stop fighting the hard and start embracing the pressure to become—to rise up, to get stronger, to get better.

Things I’m Doing to Get Better and Have It All in Motherhood

Here’s the deal: I’m not settling for just “getting by.” I’m done with that. I want more for myself, and I want more for my family. But I’m not pretending that I’ve got it all figured out. What I am doing is putting in the work to get stronger, to reinvent myself, and to show up as the mom and woman I want to be. And I’m doing it with intention—no more just winging it.

I’m doing these things to get better in motherhood, because if I can do it, you can too. Here’s what I’ve been focusing on:

Journaling and Writing My Way to Clarity

Journaling has been a total game-changer. It’s not just about writing down how my day went—it’s about clarity. I’m getting crystal clear on what I want, who I want to become, and what I need to do to get there. Every night (or at least a few times a week), I take the time to practice “being” my future self.

I know, it sounds a little woo-woo and weird at first, right? But here’s why it works:

• Your thoughts create your feelings: The thoughts you think every day shape how you feel. For example, if you think, “I’m overwhelmed,” that thought creates a feeling of stress or anxiety.
• Your feelings drive your actions: How you feel influences what you do. If you feel stressed, you might procrastinate or avoid certain tasks. If you feel confident, you’re more likely to take action and tackle what’s in front of you.
• Your actions lead to results: Every action you take—or don’t take—creates the results you see in your life. If you want to see different results, you need to change how you act, which starts with changing how you feel and think.

So, when I’m trying to shift into my future self, I need to start with the right thoughts. By identifying what thoughts will make me feel how I want to feel, I can practice those thoughts consistently, which changes how I show up. Over time, it gets easier and easier to be that version of me.

Sounds a little woo at first, right? But here’s the science: research shows that you can actually rewire your brain through this process. It’s not just a fluffy idea—it’s a scientifically proven method that thousands of people have used to transform their lives. And it’s a super powerful tool that I’m implementing in my own journey to become the best version of myself and get stronger in motherhood.

Implementing Strategic Routines to Get My Life on Autopilot

Routines are my secret sauce. If you’ve ever felt like you’re just treading water, trying to keep your head above the chaos, routines are the life raft. They make the mundane stuff happen without relying on willpower. I’ve been setting up simple, strategic habits—like making sure the house is tidy, meal prepping, and making time for workouts. These little things don’t take a lot of effort, but they add up over time and move the needle in my life. When I do these things consistently, they stop being a chore and just become part of my day.

Investing in How I Look and Feel

I’m focusing on taking care of myself—not just for the sake of vanity, but because when I look good, I feel good. I’m doubling down on taking care of my skin, staying active, and putting in the effort to look and feel confident. Because let’s face it: it’s way more fun to rock a bikini on the beach when you feel hot instead of self-conscious. When I feel good in my body, it’s like everything else falls into place. I have more energy, more confidence, and just a more joyful experience of life.

Focusing on Who I’m Being, Not Just What I’m Doing

It’s not just about getting the things done—it’s about who I’m being while I do them. I’m paying attention to the energy I bring into my relationships, my work, and my day-to-day. I don’t want to just be physically present with my family; I want to be mentally and emotionally present too. I want to savor every moment, whether it’s reading a book to my toddler or having a conversation with my partner. I’m choosing to show up as my best self, not just do all the things.

Doubling Down on Consistency

Consistency is everything. The truth is, everything I want is on the other side of consistency. A strong body? Consistency. A thriving business? Consistency. Healthy relationships? Consistency. I’m crafting habits that will keep me on track, even on the days when I’m tired or distracted. It’s the small things, done consistently, that add up over time. So I’m building that muscle now so I can see the results later.

Getting My Hands in My Life

The last thing I’m doing is diving in—getting my hands dirty in this process of growth. I’m not waiting for the perfect moment. I’m not waiting for everything to be “right.” I’m jumping in, learning as I go, and staying committed to my growth. No comparing, no second-guessing. I’m just staying devoted to becoming the best version of myself for me, for my family, and for the life I want to create.

What If Motherhood Was the Spark That Transformed You?

What if instead of motherhood feeling like something you have to just survive, you let it transform you? What if you let this season of your life be the spark that lights the fire for your growth, for becoming stronger, and for stepping into the best version of yourself?

Just like building muscle at the gym—the weights don’t get any lighter. But you get stronger. And soon, things that once felt hard, get easier. It’s the same with motherhood. The struggles won’t magically disappear, but you will get stronger. And that’s when the magic happens.

Ready to Reinvent Yourself in Motherhood?

If you’re ready to step into a stronger, more intentional version of yourself, it’s time to take action. I created the THAT Mom Clarity Calculator as a culmination of all the tools and strategies I’ve pieced together to help me navigate this unique season of motherhood. It’s helped me alchemize into my version of “that mom,” and now, I’m sharing it with you.

Think of it like your personal GPS. It helps you figure out where you’re at (what’s working and what’s not), where you want to go (the best version of yourself—the you who embodies those “that mom” vibes), and what small, consistent habits and routines you can start implementing to actually become her.

If you’ve ever felt like you’re spinning your wheels or just getting by, this is your chance to take control. The THAT Mom Clarity Calculator is your first step in getting clear on who you really want to be and how to show up for your family, your goals, and yourself in a way that feels aligned, empowered, and so much more you.